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10 (Harmless) Ways to Get Out of an Engagement1 comment

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Breaking an engagement is never easy to do and it will inevitably affect both parties.
| by Melanie //

But think about this. It is best to call off the engagement now before you get married and then look for ways to get a divorce. We only live once and we do not live long enough to be married to someone we do not want to be married to. As much as the other person’s feelings matter, you cannot trick yourself into loving them. Here are some ways to break off an engagement.

10. Give him the ring back

When you do tell him that you want to call off the engagement, be nice and return the engagement ring he gave you. Many girls have a tendency to forget to give the ring back and hold on to it. Why would you want to hold on to it? Giving it back to him is like saying “Thanks, but no thanks.”

9. Write a note

I know it can be hard to tell him to his face that you want to call off the engagement. Why not write a note instead? This way you will be able to tell him exactly how you feel and explain the reasons why. And maybe once he reads the note, you can meet up and have a talk to give him some closure. That will help him deal with the breakup better.

8. Leave a message explaining it on his phone

Before you leave a message explaining it on the phone, you need to sit down and think about what you are going to say. You do not want to be rude during this message. Again, make sure that you meet him once you’ve broken the news. Just a phone message is hardly the right way to break up.

7. Send an email

Once again, I don’t think an email is the ideal way to actually call off the engagement but you can use it either to explain why you did it after you tell him face to face or right before you actually do it. Type it out and hit send. You do not have to worry about delivering the message to him. Technology will do it for you.

6. Sit down and explain it to him

As with any kind of breakup, it is best to call off an engagement face to face. You owe him that much. So sit him down and explain why you don’t want to get married. Maybe there’s another guy in the picture. Maybe you chickened out. Maybe you’re just not ready to commit. Be honest and talk your heart out. You never know, maybe the two of you will actually work things out.

5. Tell him “I’m sorry, but…”

“I’m sorry, but I just don’t want to be married yet. You’re a nice guy and all and if I wanted to get married, I would marry you, but I want to wait a bit longer, so here’s your engagement ring back.” That’s all you have to say. Tell him nothing will change your mind. I know easier said than done but he needs to know that you truly are sorry.

4. Be honest

When you speak with him, it is important to be honest. Give him enough respect and do not lie to him. If you cheated on him, then tell him. If you can’t marry him because your religious beliefs are different (I have heard of this one), then let him know. Whatever the reasons, however silly they might seem, it’s best to be honest.

3. Don’t be rude

When you are speaking with him, do not be rude. Expect him to get upset, he may even yell a bit. Let him know that you are sorry for wasting his time. Show respect.

2. Don’t yell back

In number 3, I told you he may yell. When he yells at you, do not yell back at him. I am not saying to sit there and take it but at least speak calmly. Two people getting upset is no good. If push comes to shove, say what you need to say and leave. There’s no point getting into an argument.

1. Tell him it’s just not meant to be

Tell him you two are not meant to be married. It is best if you just remain friends. You come from two different worlds and cannot see yourself marrying him.

Those are the 10 nicest ways to get out of an engagement. After you do this, you may want to look at my other post on ways to avoid your ex. So, are you in an engagement and need to get out? Is there a reason? Have you ever ended an engagement?


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1 comment

  1. Lisa

    I recently broke off an engagement with a wonderful guy. Understand that being a husband is more that being a wonder guy. A man must have the ability to lead his wife. I had second thoughts before he gave me the ring, but I didn’t want to hurt him. The problem was, he was not ready, nor was he able to take care of a family. When I thought about the commitment I was about to make to God, I couldn’t go through with it. In today’s world, people marry for the wrong reason. Marriage is a lifelong commitment you make to God and to your mate. Marriage is not about the glitz and glamour of a wedding ceremony. Your mate is not what makes you complete, instead he/she should compliment you.

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