Affection, appreciation and physical desire are some of the most basic required needs for any human, so why is it that so many people find staying in love so difficult?
Falling in love begins the most wonderful part of a relationship. But long-term connections do not happen by accident. They grow. Neglect a relationship and it dies, care for it and watch it grow.
One of the main ingredients to a successful relationship is that of presence. Not just a physical presence (although any relationship would die without this), but emotional presence and awareness of your partner’s feelings and needs. It means not just being by your partners side, but there for them when they need you, both emotionally and physically. You know the feeling when you listen to someone’s feelings and interests, only to have your own fall onto deaf ears, there is no sharing of mutual presence here and this is one of the main requirements for staying in love.
Staying in love means accepting responsibility. Many people bring with them to any relationship excess baggage from previous relationships, family or childhood issues. Examples of this are women who were mistreated by their fathers and take it out on their partners and men who did not feel the required love from their partner. If we desire to stay in love, it is essential that each party accepts responsibility for resolving inner conflicts and sharing issues with their partner. A problem shared is a problem halved.
Staying in love means more than keeping an active sex life. While sex is such a huge component in a loving relationship, no relationship based solely on sex will survive. Love is also an emotional relationship, the man who neglects his wife’s emotional needs, and expects an active partner in bed is inviting mutual frustration into the relationship. Staying in love is the result of an ongoing physical and emotional connection. But to the contrary, the wife who shows her husband no affection or warmth is inviting him to find such a physical connection elsewhere. Many men commit adultery, not just for the sexual desire, but for the fact that they can find an emotional connection that they cannot get at home, with someone else.
Staying in love means romance, emotional connection and a generous and mutual physical bond. Love is not one sided, all facets of love require dedication and sacrifice from both parties. Love listens, love cares and love does not judge. Be there for your partner and she/he will be there for you when you need them the most. Care for your partner and show them physical affection every day and you can expect the same in return.
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