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What A Woman’s Stuffed Animals Say About Her

Photo: Getty Images //
A woman’s stuffed animal collection can reveal much about her dating habits.
| by Denise Ngo //

Guys: The next time a woman invites you to her apartment, scope out her living space for stuffed animals. They’re more common than you might think. And if you do happen to glimpse a teddy bear, a Hello Kitty or, worse, a collection of porcelain dolls, you may want to keep in mind what it could mean about her dating habits.

Classic teddy bear: She’s an old-fashioned, down-to-earth, refined woman who not only enjoys the great outdoors, but will probably win over your mom.

Build-A-Bear toy: From outside its big glass windows, Build-A-Bear stores look like your average DIY toy stores, but what unsuspecting customers don’t know is that the staff will make you twirl around and kiss a fabric heart before sewing it into your creation. Clearly, a woman who owns a Build-A-Bear doll doesn’t shy away from child-like activities, or she had an old boyfriend who wasn’t afraid to embarrass himself for her. Consider the bar raised.

Raggedy old stuffed animal: Aw, she’s probably had that floppy-eared stuffed bunny since babyhood. You’ve got a sentimental, tender-hearted girl on your hands. Wine and dine this one—she’s probably the type who journals daily and keeps movie tickets. She may also be the type who keeps romantic tokens from old boyfriends.

Gigantic giraffe, hamster or bear: An ex probably won (or purchased) that life-sized carnival toy for her. Most women throw away such large reminders of the past, but if she keeps hers on full display, she may be high-maintenance, demanding or hard to please.

Unicorns, ponies or anything from Sanrio : She might not always show it, but she’s got a girly-girl side. If things work out between the two of you, she’ll probably call you by a cutesy nickname or send “I miss you” texts throughout the day. Don’t get too frightened, though—girls who love Hello Kitty usually know how to make a good batch of cupcakes.

Cheap collection of stuffed animals: If you can tell, on sight, that her stuffed animals came from the clearance aisle of a CVS, you can assume one of three things: she’s a penny-pincher, she has questionable taste or she has had a number of penny-pinching suitors.

Bed covered in neat assortment of toys: Either she doesn’t get a lot of action, she’s a neat freak or—considering how labor-intensive it is to rearrange an array of pillows and stuffed sheep every time you make the bed—she has a lot of free time on her hands.

Stuffed animals scattered throughout the apartment: This woman may have kids she hasn’t told you about.

No stuffed animals in sight, but porcelain dolls everywhere: Porcelain dolls are beautiful and expensive, but we’d be lying if we said that having a collection of them wasn’t creepy. Who likes having glass eyes look at them while they sleep? Prepare yourself for dates reminiscent of a Tim Burton movie.

No stuffed animals: You’ve got a practical, no-frills kind of woman here. She’ll most likely offer to pay dutch, will buy books from second-hand stores, and probably enjoys a warm, homemade dinner as much as a fancy four-star dining experience.

Of course, a woman’s stuffed animals don’t reveal everything about her. We will say one thing, though: if she makes her stuffed animals talk to and interact with you on a regular basis, you should probably cut down on the sleepovers.

One reply on “What A Woman’s Stuffed Animals Say About Her”

But what about a girl who has a few plushies thrown on the bed, not neatly put? Including an Ikea shark.

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