If you are in a relationship that is quickly headed downhill, the problem may not be your partner. Chances are you are equally at fault. Now if this is the 10th relationship in a row that has taken a drastic turn for the worst, you may find out you are sabotaging your relationships without even realizing it! Below, I’ve got all of the tips that can help you see if you are sabotaging your relationship!
1. Be True to You
The worst thing a girl can do, in my opinion, is sell herself short in the name of love. If your partner can’t love you for who you really are then forget about it. Putting on a constant act for a relationship is tiring. Eventually your true colors are going to show. The other person is going to feel totally blind sided and hurt. Chances are the real you is 100 times better than the fake you anyways.
2. Know Your Self-Worth
You can’t go into a relationship looking for another person to complete you. That’s just insane. You have got to know how amazing and independent you are before perusing a relationship. Being clingy, and constantly needing the other person means that your partner is very likely to to feel smothered and turned off by your behavior. This is another way that you could be sabotaging your relationship.
3. No Settling
Don’t settle for less than what you deserve or want. So many times, I see my friends going along with a guy causally, when what they really want is a full on relationship. If you are looking for the real deal, don’t settle for a hookup. Being casual with someone may be blocking your vision of someone else that is worthy and ready to commit to you. This is another way you might be sabotaging your relationship before you even get into one!
4. Open Palm
One of my favorite quotes about love says, how love is like holding sand. If you hold sand with a clenched fist the sand spills out the sides, but if you hold it with an open palm it stays in place. If you are holding on too tightly to your love, you may be sabotaging your relationship. You’ve got to hold on just hard enough.
5. Talking Negative about Yourself
Do you have one of those friends who is always saying how ugly she is, how fat she looks, or simply how unhappy she is with her appearance? It gets annoying doesn’t it? One sign you are sabotaging your relationship, is being guilty of this same, self-negative-talk. If you are constantly telling your partner how ugly you are, then in essence you are telling the person who finds you exquisite that they have bad taste. Who likes to be told they have bad taste? Plus it is pretty draining constantly having to reassure someone they look good.
6. Unrealistic Expectations
Are your expectations for your relationship and partner realistic? Just like we can’t expect ourselves to lose 50 pounds in a month, we can’t hold someone else to fantasy like expectations. There is a huge difference between real life and romantic comedies. Don’t sabotage your relationship with unrealistic expectations.
7. Past Hurts
Don’t make your new relationship pay for the mistakes of your last. Hopefully your new guy isn’t the jerk that you caught making out with your best-friend on your birthday. If he isn’t, then cut him some slack. Sure, you are afraid of getting hurt again, but if he hasn’t done anything to show you he can’t be trusted, you have to chill out. If you don’t, you are going to sabotage this relationship before it even gets started. Let the past be the past and don’t let it wreck your future.
I hope these 7 signs you are sabotaging your relationship will help you identify ways you are hurting your current relationship, so you can make changes. What are some signs you are sabotaging your relationship that you have seen or done before?