Shy Magazine

Sex & Love

12 Reasons Women Can’t Stand Nice Guys

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Women say they want a nice guy, yet usually end up dating bad boys. Here’s why.
| by Lucia . |

Not real: Nice guys are too nice. No one can always be that nice unless they’re a saint. They are busy being nice instead of being real and women instinctually don’t trust that. Bad boys “keep it real”. Nice guys don’t want to upset the apple cart.

Respect: No one respects a doormat. Nice guys don’t set boundaries or make any real demands. A bad boy doesn’t let a woman walk all over him or control him. Women can’t respect a man they can control. No respect = No attraction.

Predictable: Most people lead boring, predictable lives, so they’re attracted to people who are exciting and a bit unpredictable. Bad boys are always a challenge. Nice guys are never a challenge. Predictable + No excitement + No challenge = I prefer a bad boy.

Mother Nature: Women are designed to nurture. However, instead of doing this with children, they often end up doing it with bad boys. They think their love will save them. Nice guys rarely need to be saved.

Fixer-Upper: Nice guys don’t usually need to be fixed. Bad boys usually do, so they become a project. Women think if they can “create” the perfect man, he will never leave them. Also, if they’re busy fixing someone else, they don’t have to look at what needs to be fixed in their own lives.

Sperm wars: Women are designed to procreate with the strongest possible genes. Bad boys are sending an unconscious message that they have great genes, so they’re not afraid of losing the woman by misbehaving. Nice guys are sending a message that they don’t think their genes are good enough, so they won’t misbehave.

Fear of intimacy: If a woman is afraid of intimacy, she subconsciously knows she can avoid it with a bad boy, since she can never get close enough to him to have to go there. A nice guy will eventually want a commitment, and that’s scary.

Low self-esteem: We don’t feel comfortable with people who treat us better than we treat ourselves. If you don’t think much of yourself, the bad boy is simply reinforcing your negative belief. A nice guy is treating you in a way you’re not familiar with.

Sex: Women feel a nice guy won’t be good in bed. They sometimes like to be manhandled and think a nice guy won’t be able to take control and get the job done. A bad boy comes across as being able to deliver, even though that may not always be the case.

Hot: Have you ever seen a bad boy who wasn’t hot? I’m sure there are a few, but they wouldn’t be able to get away with half the stuff they did if they didn’t look so good. Meanwhile, when a woman describes someone as a nice guy, she means, “He’s not hot”.

Charm: Nice guys don’t always know what to say, and are sometimes at a loss for words. Bad boys can be very charming and know exactly what women want to hear. However, they eventually switch over to being selfish. By the time they reveal their true colors, the woman has fallen for them and has a hard time letting go.

Protection: Historically, men have protected women—physically and otherwise. Bad boys give the illusion of being able to protect women, while with nice guys, women aren’t so sure. Life is about balance. Most men fall into either the bad boy or the nice guy category. The ideal man is neither, but walks that fine line between the two. Until men learn how to do this, more often than not, women will choose the bad boy, until they realize that his bad qualities outweigh his good ones.

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4 replies on “12 Reasons Women Can’t Stand Nice Guys”

To guys who have no luck with women for whatever reason (too quiet, too nice, whatever) here is my advice: Concentrate on your career and education where you will see a positive return. Re-order your priorities and move dating from #1 to #10. Career and education should be #1 and #2. If anyone asks why you are not dating say this “I am pretty busy right now but will get back to it at a future date.” This is an acceptable response that offends no one. Your enhanced status might improve your chances with women or it might not but it doesn’t matter since you are better off regardless.

Well I have no idea how I ended up on this webpage full of bullshit. It’s not instinct, it’s called stupid people buying into trends. The only reason I married my husband 18 years ago was because he was a genuinely nice guy who had his shit together and actually listens to reason. We respect each other and no one should “control” any one in a relationship. How dumb can you be? 

I have never read such rubbish! men do not take this article as fact.
Many western men are going overseas to find love. Western women have bought into the “bad boy” thing. Many of these guys run when they come up against responsibility. And the women when they have hit 35+ who have been used and abused by the “bad boy” start to look for the “nice guy”( yes the guy who these women looked down their noses at!) because the “bad boy jumped town / prison and left them with baggage.

Jeeez, women are properly dumb….

This article shows that women know exactly what they are doing, & what the consequences of their actions are, yet continue to succumb to primal urges (like animals).

If you’re a woman reading this article and you agree with everything that was said… well, I’m afraid you are going to die very alone, or with someone but extremely unhappy and regretful.

Do yourselves a favor and get a REAL MAN, a NICE MAN. Not some delinquent piece of crap you picked up at a bar.

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