The 8 signs he is not ready to commit that I’ve posted below are some common ones to look for. The simplest way to know is if he comes right out and tells you that he isn’t, but a lot of guys aren’t that straight forward. Not all the signs listed below are for sure, since men tend to handle their feelings in a completely different way than women. However, they do apply to most of the guys I know!
8. He’s secretive
Having little secrets from one another is only natural, but when he abruptly ends his cell phone calls the moment you walk into the room this can cause some concern. I guess a better word for this form of secretive would be ‘sneaky’. A sneaky guy tends to make me wonder what he’s trying to hide. It might be something that he feels ashamed about. It’s hard to know unless he is willing to communicate as to why he’s so secretive all the time.
7. You have no idea who his family is
I dated this guy for close to three years and never got to meet any of his family members. Wait, I take that back. I did meet a brother at the grocery store, but he didn’t introduce us and he only told me it was his brother after we got back home. Weird. Sure, there are some family members that tend to not be in the main loop as much as others, but I think being introduced to at least one parent is a reasonable request.
6. His friends are surprised when you meet them
This might not be that big of a deal, but I think it is when you’ve been dating this guy for 3 years. After this length of time his friends should at least know your name, right? If I am greeted with a shocked expression when my honey introduces me to his closest friends, then I feel like he doesn’t talk about me at all. It only makes sense that if he’s ready to commit that he would be telling his friends all about me.
5. Introduces you as his friend
Really? To tel you the truth, if a guy I’d been dating introduced me as his friend, I’m afraid I’d be a little bit peeved. He’d have some major explaining to do! The only time I see this as being an okay thing is when the relationship has just begun and you both are trying to figure out where it’s headed. If you’ve been dating many years and your guy still introduces you as a friend or even a good friend, it might be time to have a little chat. You both might be having different ideas on where your relationship stands.
4. He chooses his friends over you
Now, I understand that a guy shouldn’t have to hang out with his girlfriend 24/7. I actually think that is not only unhealthy, but a bit boring. Sometimes women need to hang out with the girls and relax, while the guys do manly things. A red flag should only be raised if your beloved always chooses to hang out with his friends instead of you. I’m sure there’s a legitimate reason why some guys won’t take their lady out to dinner or the movies; ever. I have a friend who won’t eat in public, so he never takes his wife out to dinner. He’s had a fear of eating in front of strangers since he was a small child and his wife accepted this when they were dating, so it wasn’t ever a problem.
3. Talks about the future, but his plans are all about him
Hearing a lot of ‘I’ statements coming from your guy generally mean he’s not thinking that you are going to be around in the future. Some guys are good at voicing their ideas, but it might be helpful to find out whether he’s simply thinking aloud or if he is interested in obtaining your opinion on his little adventures. The next time he makes a statement about something he is going to do, try replacing ‘I’ with ‘we’ and see if he freaks out.
2. Doesn’t show interest in what you have to say
I know I don’t always talk about things that a guy would deem as being interesting, but it is still nice if he pays attention when I’m talking to him. Changing the subject when you begin talking about something, rolling his eyes, looking bored, and not commenting on what you’ve just said are signs that often signifies that he really isn’t interested in what you have to say. I don’t mind this from time to time, but when it happens constantly I take it as a sign that he doesn’t find me interesting. If I’m unable to hold his attention, then he probably isn’t going to ask me to marry him.
1. He isn’t willing to express his feelings
Guys are a funny lot. They don’t usually express their feelings to everyone around them. However, if my guy can’t even tell me how he feels about me or if he’s vague about his feelings for me, then I can only take this behavior as a sign that he’s unsure about us. Usually people know when they care deeply for someone and when they are ready to commit to this person they feel strongly for.
These 8 signs he is not ready to commit might pertain to your guy and they might not. It’s always best to ask and see what the response is instead of assume he isn’t ready to commit. Communication is key in any healthy relationship. Reading these signs and then accusing your man of not being ready to take the relationship further could only damage things between you. Have you noticed any additional signs in guys you’ve known for sure weren’t ready to commit?