Noted, buddy. But I have to say, as a woman, and a whole lot of one at that, even though you’ve already taken me home and gotten me naked, I still need to hear that you are ready for this jelly. Say something nice. Otherwise, I’ll think you’re not telling me how nice my booty is because you don’t like what you see. I swear, I’m not normally so insecure, but when I drop my dress, you need to start the sweet talkin’. Even if it’s a lie and you’re glad I turned the lights off, just tell me I’m pretty. You gotta do that, gentleman, and eight more things during sex besides get off …
1) Take Some Initiative: Don’t just do what you know is going to get me off. Have fun, show me what you like to do to me. Don’t simply go through the motions.
2) Kiss Something Besides My Mouth: My lips are like one percent of me; your kiss feels good on the other 99 percent.
3) Take All Your Clothes Off: Shirt, shoes, no service. I want it off. I want it all off!
4) Make Some Noise: You don’t have to impersonate R. Kelly, but please let me know when and where I’m pleasing you.
5) Watch The Hair: Unless you’re pulling it intentionally, please don’t pin my hair down accidentally. It hurts and I don’t want to ruin the mood by complaining about it.
6) Look Me In The Eye: We don’t have to lock eyes forever, but a solid check-in makes me feel desired and gives me the chance to flash you a sexy look.
7) Focus On The Sweet Action: Don’t be high-five-ing yourself in the mirror, writing your grocery list in your head, etc. I’m right in front of you, and I’m naked. Focus!
8) Ask Me What I Like: You might really like what I say.
9) Let Me Know What You Like: If I’m sleeping with you, I want to make this fun for everyone. So, don’t be shy, boys.
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