The answers were thought provoking, to say the least. They ranged from “lip gloss” to “financial independence,” revealing that personal values remain unique to every woman. However, there were some responses that seemed to be consistent throughout the group that I polled. The following is a list of five things that seem to be the most fundamental in finding fulfillment as a single woman, regardless of your current dating situation.
A plan for the future.
Whether your goals are educational, occupational, or both – at the top of the “must have” chart is the need to have a plan for the future. While wandering aimlessly through life is a lot of fun, it will not pay the bills or secure your retirement. Developing a plan for the future is simple: decide what you want out of life and then do some research to find out what it takes to get there. If you’d like to run your own corporation one day, what kind of educational path should you take? What kind of job experience should you be acquiring in the mean time? If you’d like to put some money into your 401k to ensure a financially sound future – what investment strategies should you use? How much money should you put into savings each pay check? Although these questions aren’t necessarily fun, you will be happy you addressed them when you have a solid foundation upon which to stand.
A good group of girlfriends.
Carrie Bradshaw in “Sex and the City” said it best, “No matter who breaks your heart, or how long it takes to heal, you’ll never get through it without your friends.” A good group of girlfriends is better than a whole gallon of Ben & Jerry’s in the freezer. When times are good, you will have someone to share in your successes and celebrations. When times are bad, you will have someone to come over at 3am and pull your head out of the oven. No woman is an island, ladies-No, not even you. Though your independence is impressive, we all need people to lean on when our resolve waivers.
A supply of condoms.
Really, ladies, we are simply mature enough to know better than to be caught in the heat of the moment with a man who conveniently doesn’t have a condom. No matter how sexy he is, that’s no excuse to jump without a parachute. Buy a box of condoms (and preferably an additional method of birth control) and pack ’em.
A solid sense of self-identity.
Self-identity is the source of self-confidence and self-respect. A woman who knows who she is and what she wants also knows what she deserves and refuses to settle for less. And why should you settle for less? You’re fabulous! The ugly truth is: people will do whatever you let them get away with. So put a stop to it! Demand respect from others. Carry that confidence around with you like a huge blinking neon sign. Show the world you are proud of who you are, know what you want, and won’t stop until you get it.
A single woman on the move has to be up for anything. You simply can’t be ready at a moment’s notice if you’re laid up on the couch guzzling cough syrup. Take care of yourself. See a doctor regularly. Try to maintain a healthy lifestyle by eating the right foods and maintaining a regular exercise regimen. Take your vitamins. What happens if your boss decides that today is the day you’re ready for your big promotion and you’ve called out sick? What if today is the day that the hottie in legal has worked up the nerve to ask you out, but you’re lying in bed in a sea of used Kleenex? It’s not cute, and definitely not productive! A n integral part of ensuring both a fulfilling future and the highest quality of life is to make the practice of health a priority.
Ultimately, you can choose where your life will lead you. Strive for those things that will help you get to where you’d like to be in the next five or ten years. In a world that’s constantly in motion, it’s essential to think beyond next Saturday night – and the only person who can do that for you is you. Today’s single woman is empowered and independent. So grab the bull by the horns, kick butt and take names, and most importantly, remember that we are all the masters of our own destiny no matter what our personal “must-haves” are.
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