Shy Magazine

Sex & Love

7 Ways to Get Your Ex Back

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Relationships are made of fragile bonds. They need to be continually nurtured and respected in order to grow.
| by Melanie |

In a relationship, your partner and you are responsible for providing value to the other half and if you don’t, sometimes these bonds break. If you however feel that you are still in love with your ex after the breakup, it is time to get them back. I am a girl, so I will be writing this from a girl’s perspective. However, I am sure some of these tips will be useful for guys as well. Below, you are going to find 7 ways to get your ex back…

7. Stay strong
No matter what you do, it is important that you stay strong. You should never come off as being needy. Clinging, begging and acting desperate is a big break-up no-no. This will more than likely chase him off, instead of attract him back. I am not saying that breakups are easy, I personally know that they are tough, but you should keep the crying and yelling behind closed doors.

6. Minimize your contact with him
Closing those doors of communication may seem like they are not going to do any justice for you, but they will. This is one of the most important steps. There is a reason that the two of you have reached this point and obviously, someone here needs a break. Give your ex some space and time to clear his mind. Sometimes, starting over is the best thing you can do.

5. You need to be flexible
This is not time to start barking out orders such as “pick up your things by Monday or I am going to throw them out.” You are wrong if you are under the impression that you are going to be scaring them to the point that they will return to you. Take note that your ex went away from you because they were unhappy with some aspect of the relationship. This probably means that it is time for you to become a listener and pay more attention to his needs. That’s one way to build the foundation for a successful relationship.

4. Get out of your room
It is time to turn off the broken heart songs, lift yourself up off of that bed or couch and go out and have some fun! Give those old friends a ring and get yourself out of the house. You need to develop other forms of entertainment and stop worrying. This does not mean you have to go out and start dating again. You don’t even have to be interested in anyone. The key here is to have fun with friends and family and stop being depressed.

3. Figure out what went wrong
Now is the time to sit by yourself and figure out what went wrong. Unless you can understand what led to the downfall of the two of you, how can you set things right? What made the first couple of weeks or months together so special? Why did you feel so strongly when it was a new relationship and when did it fizzle out? Try to pinpoint exactly what changed in your relationship.

2. Be honest with him
If you still love him, then tell him this at least one time. Honesty is always going to pay off. Even if he does not say anything back, he will still know that you love and care about him. This is something that will stay in his mind. If it is meant to be, then he will remember this.

1. Show respect
Of course, when you are trying to get an ex back, you will need to show respect, no matter what sex you are. Having respect for another person is showing them that you still care. Don’t go throwing their stuff out, have respect for their stuff as well. Sure, you can put it in a box and stuff it in your closet so that you do not think of them 24/7, but remember girls, respect them. Do not go up to them in public and start yelling at them. Do not complain and whine about them to your friends. Leave aside the petty issues and jealousy. Remember that you have both wronged each other so take responsibility for your mistakes.

Getting your ex back in a relationship can be a tough job. However, if you find that you do not succeed at it, then don’t let this get you down. If he does not come back to you, then this obviously means that it is not meant to be. It is time to move on and overcome the breakup, girl. What about you, are you hurting and need to get your ex back badly? How long have you had those horrible break up blues? Have you ever gotten back together with an ex? How did you do it?

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